Sunday , July 21 2019
tts photography tips photo


So you think you have to take a selfie? Nowadays selflies are all over social media. However, it is appalling how lousy selflies generally are composed. Folks should realize that once a selfie is submitted to a social media site it has the potential to reach millions of people, forever! So why not take an extra 13 seconds and compose at least a decent selfie?

My firm belief is that not everyone should be allowed to post a selfie on a social media site. There should be rigorous examine boards that approve only hot girls to post on social media sites. Similar panels should also approve the right to purchase yoga pants, but that is another story! Now we do live in a free country so if a person wants to send a selfie to a loved one go ahead! If I was only king!

Anyways, the main reason that I am blogging on this topic is that the standard look at the cell phone while snapping a selfie is driving me loco! Ladies in particular spend a lot of time doing there hair and makeup. Why after all this preparation do ladies insist on looking at the phone instead of looking up?

Let’s take a look at this horrible selfie below for an example of what not to do in a selfie!tts photography tips photo

Middle aged, balding man with a large frontal beer and pizza storage compartment should never, ever snap a selfie! Never ever! Nobody wants to see this!

The next error I make with this selfie is staring at the phone like a deer looking into the headlights of car. For the love of all that is holy look up!

I do not consider my background in the above selfie. The background is busy and highlighted by hideous wall paper that should only be used for wrapping paper! Be aware of your background!

My next mistake is taking the selfie from too far away! There are lots of distracting things surrounding me in this selfie. Bring the phone closer to your body or use the crop feature on your phone to eliminate the distractions!


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Don’t take a selfie in the mirror! Mirrors do offer the advantage of the full body capture, but are NO BEUNO! If you require a full body selfie enlist the help of a friend.

And last, but not least! Consider your lighting. Just give it a thought. I am not asking for you to use full studio lighting. Just take 3.5 seconds to consider better lighting if the option is available! In the above selfie the lighting is glaring badly off my bald noggin as well as the wrapping paper style wall covering.

Below is an example of a still sucky selfie, but a vast improvement from the crime on humanity selfie in the above photo.

tts photography tips photo

In the above selfie, I look up instead of into the camera with my brilliant, blue eyes, hide my bald spot with a cap, and slightly tilt my head to showcase my power dimple. I also take the selfie at a closer range which eliminates background distractions and hides my crumb catcher. The lighting still sucks, but it is better than the top photo.

So to recap the 6 selfie tips :

1) Don’t look into the phone.
2) Consider your background.
3) Fill the screen with you. (which also eliminates a photo bomb)
4) Don’t take a mirror selfie. Ever!
5) Consider your lighting.
6) Use the cropping and/or filter features of your phone.

Bonus tip: Middle, aged fat boys. No selfies for you!

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One comment

  1. I could not agree more! What the hell is so tough about taking a selfie. This blog is funny! Please write more!

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