Friday , February 23 2018
Home / Tag Archives: mid life dating advice

Tag Archives: mid life dating advice

Adventures With Jayde: Bad Luck App

Congratulations to BroMan69420 for winning TTS swag for asking Jayde a question! As you know Tinder and I are not on good terms. I seem to have the worst bloody luck on this damned app.  I am so busy these days I have no other way to meet Mr. Potential, Future Ex-Husband so I continue my quest of swiping right. Anyhow, I met another terrible hookup via Tinder a few weeks ago. I was bored and had some spare time before work so decided to meet this guy named Jay in midtown for some White Russians. We met at this hipster dive in the notoriously flamboyant part of Houston. Jay looked exactly like his photos, minus the llama he was sitting on. He had salt and ...

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Bad Advice With Staci Monroe #5

Howdy Campers! After a week off I am back and ready to answer all of your most pressing concerns. Let’s do this. Image credit: source buzzfeed.com I work for a very small family run business. Our office is a lot bigger than our current needs so in an effort to make money my boss has begun renting out office space to other small businesses or self-employed individuals. One of these people is a sweet, elderly man, a longtime mentor to my boss who is also kind and delightful, always having a story to tell or cookies for us that his wife baked. Here’s the issue, he apparently only rents space from us so he has a place to go to watch porn, because from the ...

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Tits Behind The Taps: Cougar Bait

Watching cougars (attractive older ladies) either “hunting” younger men or being hunted by a young buck is often quite fun to watch. Many bars have their regular cougars who frequent the bar for a glass of wine or Cosmo. She is often confident and dressed in something that she borrowed from her daughter’s closest or got out of the junior’s section. A particularly memorable cougar waltzed into the bar one night with a top far too small and no bra. While she was sitting at the bar her nipple kept just popping out for the whole bar to see!  This is a hard subject to approach with a customer. What do you say? “Excuse me darling, but your nipple is showing!” Depending on the intoxicated ...

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Bad Advice with Staci Monroe #3

Congratulations to Kendra and Tiffy for winning TTS Swag! Welcome back! No witty pre-question banter today, there’s questions to answer and lives to change! Let’s get to it. Image credit: www.youngadventuress.com How do you tell your friend their kid is an asshole and you want to smack both of them? –Kendra, Colorado Springs Kendra, sweetie, honey, baby, darling. Let me ask you something. How do you imagine this scenario playing out for you? Do you think you’re going to clue your friend in to this fact and the heavens are going to part, a choir of angels will start singing and their face will light up? Do you think they’ll look at you with tears in their eyes and say “You’re right. I- I never ...

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Bad Advice With Staci Monroe #2

Congratulations to Mike and Meredith for winning this week’s TTS Swag! Welcome back! With week one firmly under our belt, I can safely say: You guys are all perverts. Asking me to send you nudes does not, in fact, constitute a question that can be safely answered in an advice column. But for the rest of you, I am here to help. Let’s get to it. Image credit: www.quickmemes.com What do you do when you stumble upon your significant other’s porn stash, and it’s crazier than you were expecting? – Mike, Newark Well Mike, I think we need to look at what you mean by “crazier”. What’s crazy? Things that are perfectly acceptable to some people, say, oh I don’t know, just off the top ...

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Bad Advice With Staci Monroe

Hello and Welcome to Bad Advice, column where I, Staci Monroe, do my best not to lose interest in your questions halfway through reading them and start fantasizing about that Burrito I had last night. Damn, that was a good burrito. Anyway, let’s dive right in, shall we? I have reached middle age and it’s all downhill from here. My wife is encouraging me to get a BMW, so as to focus my mid-life crisis energy and dissuade me from getting more tattoos. While I like BMWs, I also like Mustangs. She does not like Mustangs. Is it true that “Mustangs are for douche bags” and that “Owning a Mustang is a sign that you have a small penis”? Because while I do have a ...

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