Wednesday , September 20 2017
Home / Tag Archives: mostly true tales

Tag Archives: mostly true tales

Curiously Gay Hotel

A Stumbling Otis Original We were young, poor and had done our very best to pay for our own wedding, so the gift was perfect. The gift was a honeymoon. It came wrapped in a Hallmark envelop from my bride’s father and step-mom. The card said, “This coupon good for three nights on the water in Laguna Beach”. Fucking beautiful, we were tapped out so until then our honeymoon looked like box wine and filthy, bedroom sex. “Filthy, bedroom sex” being a classic double entendre: as our bedroom is typically filthy, and this being our honeymoon….well. Figure it out. We had survived a week of last minute planning, out-of-town visitors, a drug-addled bachelor party (ok that was just me), an intimate “family” only wedding under ...

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Hacking on David Letterman

Congratulations to MontuckyDude for sharing his celebrity encounter As the toothy, spectacle wearing, late night show titan ends his three decade long reign on the boob tube I thought it may be appropriate to share my one and only David Letterman story. It was the late 90’s and I was driving down two-lane blacktop in central Montana bored out of my mind after an hour of watching nothing but rolling prairie farmland. I’ve had to pee for the last half hour and figure a pit stop would be a great way to break the monotony of my drive. I see a crusty gas station up ahead, glance down at my gas gauge and see a top up of petro would not be a bad idea. ...

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Skull smoking

Heaven, Hell, and the Dead!

A Stumbling Otis Original In May of 1995 the Grateful Dead played their last show in Las Vegas, Nevada. Four months later Jerry Garcia would die of a suspected cocaine-induced heart attack. Though the legacy echoes on, the death of Jerry Garcia was essentially the coffin nail to one of the greatest phenomenon of modern human history. Quite literally this tiny handful of hippie musicians tapped into an energy unrivaled and spurned a migration only comparable to the wildebeest herds of the Serengeti; this isn’t spinnerhead bullshit, the numbers are simply that large. Listen, you don’t have to like the Dead, you don’t have to get the Dead but despite your personal visions of the cosmic, everyone should respect the Grateful Dead. They earned it. ...

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Dennis’s Abrupt Halt–

A Stumbling Otis Original A Mostly True Tale — CELEBRITY ENCOUNTER EDITION We at the Thrill Society are constantly in search of things that dazzle people, ‘thrill’ them if that’s not too obvious. What we really want is to find that spark of excitement that engages YOU, our beloved viewer, to respond by submitting your own THRILLING sliver of the world.   Your voice, your photo, your footage, your words, your music— We think YOU are all THRILLING. Jep Roadie and other rappers have submitted their music videos, Caelia Might submits an almost weekly rant, Chef Danchez does a video cooking show, Crog Tierney submitted photos and video footage of kickass mountain bike riding, the Uncensored Stripper offered a revealing interview, the mysterious Rambling traveler teaches ...

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So We Egged A Porn Shop!

This weeks Mostly True Tales submission winner is Stumbling Otis Find him on Instagram at @grandreopening for tons of great pics and prose  In the early 90’s there was a quaint little porn shack on the main drag in Kalispell, Montana. It was nondescript in a way typical for a boutiques of its type. The building looked to be a converted old house, slightly ramshackle and in need of a hug. The windows were painted over white to shield the Flathead’s citizenry from forced acknowledgment of their inherent horniness. Little more than a window placard and a slightly embarrassed, glowing OPEN sign advertised its invitation for commerce. There was no official parking lot, the front door swung directly onto the narrow sidewalk, almost past the ...

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Shit Fit!

A Stumbling Otis Original  This took place a long, long time ago. I was about seven and I had a shit fit, at least that’s what my Dad called it.   A fucking bad day is what I called it. I was a farm boy. I grew up working, that’s why my parents had me; to do shit. After marriage they waited seven years, till the chores piled up, before Ma popped me in the oven. There was a plan, believe me. I was no accident of passion; no awkward, backseat hotshot. Anyway, it was hay season, late summer and hot. August soil thin as dirty flour stuck in every pore. The dry scratch of the dusty air was amplified by wheat chafe; it made ...

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Pepe The Condom Eating Chihuahua

Now before we meet Pepe the condom eating Chihuahua let’s meet Jill, Pepe’s owner. However, before we meet Jill let’s meet Nancy because the story really starts with her. Everyone’s name has been changed to protect the innocent except for Pepe, who is an Ahole and if you ever meet Pepe please take two fast steps and punt him at least 10 feet into the air for me. Would you please? So after a PBR fueled evening I managed to secure Nancy’s digits with the promise to meet in a couple of days for more cocktails. It was going to take that long to get over the pending hangover. Just as sure as swallows returning to Capistrano a couple of days later I am stroking ...

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